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Mar. 11th, 2012

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Mar. 12th, 2011

Wave to those chances as they go by..

It's hard to face the world alone, we may have people who we love and who love us around, but that doesn't mean we're not alone. It's hard to find someone who gets you, who understands why you do the things you do. It's hard to feel truly accepted by the people you want so desperately to accept you and let you in. When we say goodbye we don't actually think it's goodbye, so we throw that moment away. We say I love you, but don't mean it. We just think that it's what they want to hear and that it doesn't really mean much. But then, when everything is right, when the feelings there, how do we say I love you, if the millions of times you've said it, it's meant nothing. How do we convince that one person those three words are true, if you don't really believe in those words. So life is hard, yes, but if you want to feel accepted, if you want to belong, be brave, live. Live for those moments, live for those chances you let slip by, people say take chances, live with no regret, but that's not always the case, but that's alright, letting chances slip by makes you human. And that right there, being brave and living, being brave and letting those chances slip by, that truly makes you belong.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.


Jun. 24th, 2010

Writer's Block: Do-over!

If you were given a life do-over card, would you keep it or give it to a friend? If you kept it, would you prefer to be born to the same or different parents? Would you want to keep your memories?

Well, well. A life do-over card. So many of us would jump at the chance wouldn't we? To just be able to be reborn into someone new, to someone new. Most of us would take it without a seconds thought. Some of us may have just been through something, or going through something that leads us to believe our life is pathetic and unworthy. So when a life do-over card sneaks into our hands we'll take it.. and hope for the best that life doesn't bite our arses again.
Personally, people are too quick to throw away everything they have. No offence, but those people are selfish. They are so quick to take everything they have and re-do it. They don't think about thngs in there life, such as family, friends, even people they see every day for most of there life who they don't look twice at... have you ever thought that maybe you make someones life different? Happy?
But there are some people who do deserve a second chance at life, those who have lost their way. Those who really don't have much going in there life, but are brave enough to stick through it. They are the ones who deserve this life do-over card. The ones in our world who when their world is empty and worthless, they put on a fake smile and live... They don't pity themselves, they don't ask for attention by taking drugs, getting drunk every day, fighting or self harming.. they just live and be brave.
So if i had a life do-over card, i'd seek these people out and tell them how brave they are and how they deserve to give life one more shot.

Jun. 12th, 2010

Our generation - Something my friend wrote.


I actually hate my generation... The things you get and you barely say thanks... I mean, what's happened to manners, I'm not saying help an old woman cross the street with her shopping and you got all the manners in the world... I'm saying what happened to pleases and thank yous?!

Everything is so easy and everybody takes it for granted... Including me. But I've learned to say thanks.

It shouldn't be so easy.

Back in the old days, dads or mums wouldn't walk out on marriages, they would talk and work it out - for the sake of the kids if not for themselves... Dad's were scary. Possible boyfriends would walk into a house and be petrified of the prospect of meeting someone's dad... They would have to shake hands and say sir, please AND thank you. Not 'sup'. Dads would scare a boyfriend into doing the right thing when it came to breaking up with someone... They wouldn't reach for the phone and type out

' I'm sorry, I just don't have those feelings any more '


' Its not you... its me.... '

They would reach for their car keys, drive round to theirs, and tell them the truth, FACE-TO-FACE. A concept clearly not understandable by my generation.

An ex would SEE the pain he just caused, he would see the tears and hear the cries and begs for another chance. He SHOULDN'T walk away thinking what he's just done will take him a bottle of vodka to get over... It used to take days, weeks, sometimes months... He shouldn't feel smug because he got to end the relationship first. Back in the old days, real men would say something to his girlfriend NOT a bartender or his best friend if there was a problem. Real men knew how to treat a woman... Hold the door open. Let her sit down first. Compliments etc.

Another concept not understood by my generation.

I'm not saying men are the result of such an

unpleasant generation


Girls are just as bad.

Back then, if a girl had a problem with another girl, she would tell her TO HER FACE. It wouldn't end up in a bitch fight with hair on the floor or ripped clothes. It would end on a note that meant they might be able to fix the relationship.

Nothing was said on facebook/MSN/twitter/MySpace or even to someone else other then the person involved... It was solved by TALKING!

Everyone's problems had to wait. It wasn't solved by email or a text. It was solved by talking. You wouldn't write a text saying

' I don't like you because of what you said '

My generation would. And do.

The world STILL WORKED without the obsessive need to text/facebook/tweet/MSN/MySpace someone... People waited.

You wouldn't bunk off work or school just because you had a cold. You worked through it. It made it worse but you still worked.

The world worked BETTER when people cared about each others feelings.

My generation.... Minus a few exceptions, has the wrong idea about the world...

May. 1st, 2010

Writer's Block: Book based

Is there a book you really loved that was subsequently turned into a movie? Did it live up to your expectations? Why or why not?

Ergh, the Twilight Saga. The books are what you call.. amazing. I was so looking forward to watch the movie, but i missed out things and all i kept thinking was 'oh they should have done this, oh that should have been better' and i actually annoyed myself.

Apr. 13th, 2010

Writer's Block: Talk to the animals

What would you do if your pet dog or cat suddenly started to talk to you, but nobody else could hear it? Would you assume you'd gone mad or simply be happy for the company? Would you try to convince your friends and family or would you be satisfied keeping it to yourself?

If my pets suddenly talked, i'd feel like Dr DoLittle. I'd be happy, due to the fact i can finally understand why they do the things they do. I would tell close friends, and if they didn't believe me it's there problem. But i wouldn't broadcast it to the world, because i'd feel priviladged to be able to be given this gift.

I'd be happy for the company and even when i'm on my own, i would never truely be alone now would i?

Apr. 11th, 2010

Writer's Block: Back to the future

If you were 12 and could see yourself now, do you think you'd be happy or disappointed, and why?

Hmmmm. Difficult question. Depends when i was 12. Just working it out. 2006.
Year 8. Pffft. I'd be too involved in my own issues. I'd probably be happy actually, considering, if i'm not mistaken the whole claire, my dad, my brother ... well everything had happened, my mums breakdown etc.. it was all happening or happened. So i would be happy that i was strong enough to get through it, and to be honest, i may feel inasely lonely because i don't or haven't had someone who loved me back.. (boyfriend) in ages... i would look at the friends i have, and the new ones i'm making and realise i'm not as alone as i think. :).


Feb. 14th, 2010

Writer's Block: Love songs

What are the best and worst love songs of all time? Are there any that have special meaning to you (whether positive or negative)? Why?


My favourite song of all time is The Calling - Wherever you will go. 

Because it has so many meanings behind it. Its just about worrying about losing someone, and hoping they'll be okay once you've gone. And it means everything to me because when my parents broke up, it kept me going, when i listened to that song i knew my father wouldn't be far away from me..

Now, any song that has something about the girl being hot, or sexy is just not a good love song. Love songs are about the emotional feelings you have for one another.

Jan. 15th, 2010

Writer's Block: Time may change me ...

People often focus on the things they'd love to change about their lives. What parts of your life would you choose to keep exactly the same?

Alright i am one of those people who'd love to change a lot about their life. 
But, having said that, i'd keep a lot of things the same. I'd keep my friends. I would keep my 2 bestest closest ones. I'd have my immediate family the same. And the relationships i have with each of them. I wouldn't change my schools because they made me who i am. 

Jan. 8th, 2010

a womans heart

Tied together with a smile.

Lately i guess things have caught up with me. 
I turned 16 yesterday.. (well technically 2 days ago now as its 20 past midnight)
Anyway, i realised my love life has been non exsistant. I've been in love, yes, with more people then i actually admit. I know the difference between love and lust believe me. Love hurts more then Lust can. And i have never been loved back, not because they couldn't love me, but because i didn't give them a chance to even try. And that longing feeling of wanting to be wanted and needed and longed for. It's taken it's toll on me to the point where i feel empty all the time.
Sure i have moments when i'm laughing and smiling, and i love these moments, with my friends, with my family. But at the end of the day i have to come home, go to my bedroom and sit alone. And thats when the thoughts and the feeling of emptiness comes rushing back. And i feel dead inside. I feel so much, too much. And i know this sounds stupid but all these feelings i feel are making me numb and empty.
And now everything links back to this feeling. I hear a lovesong, (21st Century Hello!) and it makes me break down in tears because i'd love to be able to relate to it. Or i see a picture or a couple, two people happy together and it makes me sick, and i'm jealous of everyone of my friends, because they've all been in love. They've all taken that chance. And i try and make myself the better one. I make myself all egotistical. Make myself seem better then them all. And i know they realise how big headed i seem. But the truth is i don't want to fall to pieces. I don't want to admit that i feel like nothing anymore.
I even had a conversation with my Nana saying how proud she is of me. Because i write poems, she says i can think of something and write it into poems. And i looked back on my poems and realised how long i have been feeling empty. All my poems are by a girl who's too afriad to take a chance, and reading my poems are like reading my diary. The feelings i had when i wrote them came crashing back, that night i cried myself to sleep. Because i feel stupid, pathetic and numb... But i'm going to keep smiling, because what else do i have left? I mean people who know me probably think i'm being stupid and complaining. Well i hope you think that. I hope you think my smiles are real. Because least that way i know my 'mask' is working. So yes linking back to the song i'm listening to. I am tied together with a smile. If i don't have a smile on my face. What do i have?


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